Hi friend!

Hello, hello! How’s your summer been? Oh, and your spring? Have you done anything fun? Anything life-changing??

We took a major road trip this past March to explore Santa Fe, Sedona, and the Grand Canyon. I felt so connected to the quiet peace and stark beauty of the American West, I just couldn’t bring myself to come back ‘online.’ 

Maybe you noticed I went missing for a bit…and maybe you were so busy living your own life, you didn’t. Either way, I am so glad to be writing you. 

In the name of independence, in this first full week of July, I realize that in my absence, I was working to reclaim my own freedom, from the internal and external forces I often feel weighing me down— 

✅ That I have some sort of ‘perfect hair reputation’ to uphold. 

✅ Pressure to constantly create the most informative yet entertaining social posts, and to be ‘always on.’ 

✅ 90’s kid body struggles (if you know…).

✅ Petty friendship drama that makes me question my faith in humanity.

✅ One influencer after another, on every platform, telling you what to do and who to be, the quantity of messages overwhelming… 

They’ve led me to ask: Am I perfect enough? Am I even good enough? Do I fit in? Can I pretend long enough to? Where do I belong?

I have been soul searching quite a bit these past few months.

And in response, I say:

GET LOST, UNATTAINABLE STANDARDS.

I wasn’t made the way it feels our world wants me to be.

So I hunkered way, way down. Took a major break from alllllll things social. Lived life fully in my tiny real world for a few months. Worked on new friendships. Traveled. Read a lot of books (more on those, soon, but in the meantime you can find them in my Amazon shop). And I gotta tell you, it’s been pretty great. Like, back in the 90s before the internet was always at my fingertips. Long before front-facing cameras or social media or group texting ever even existed.

I can’t be the only one wishing I could hit rewind sometimes. Right?

But then…I remember there is so much we can—and do—learn from our online peers. I just learned how to change out my rear taillight on YouTube, for crying out loud! 

And chances are good I’ve taught you something here and there about caring for your wavy hair over the last several years.

Since 2016, I’ve been storytelling my wavy hair care successes and failures and all my learnings in-between on Instagram, YouTube and Facebook. I went to cosmetology school because you asked me to. I built a small business teaching wavy friends like you, online and/or in-person, through my classes and appointments and social posts, every day. All of that, I still love. But I have changed so much in the almost-decade since I started my own wavy journey.

Looking back over the last few years, I can see the social burnout begin—the tinder placed and smoking, to engulfing flames, to today’s smoldering embers. 

How did I cope? A good therapist (glad to share his name if you’ve been struggling too), a lot of journaling, a sprinkle of Prozac, better friends who give a damn, a family who listens, and time for reading, thinking, and just being. 

When I chose transformation as my word for 2024, I had no idea the pain and beauty and magic that was on my horizon…

But my chosen word held true, despite my own intentions.

Yes, the embers still flicker occasionally, but I know that time will turn them to ash. Someday, they’ll blow away, completely, in the wind.

What will be left?

The rest of me. Imperfect. Resilient. Free. With a scaffolding of love and support made up of family, real friends, travel that fills my soul, and…you. 

I bet you’ve gone through it, too. Whatever ‘it’ may be.

So I challenge you, this month, to reclaim your own independence. Whatever that may look like for you. Should you need permission.

Take that dancing class you always yearned to. Read the book that’s been calling your name. Learn to trim up your own hair. Wear your waves and curls if you want to, or blow them out, without guilt! Learn how to create the perfect winged eyeliner…or give up makeup altogether. Take the trip you’ve been putting off. 

Really, just do it. Do it all.

Do whatever makes you feel like more of you.

This is not goodbye, but I do know that a new way of being ‘social’ is on the horizon for me.

It’s a slower pace, low-stress, post-when-I-want-to sort of vibe. 

Be sure to join my email list, because I’ll probably spend more of my time here, and on the blog. Lots of informative articles from the archives coming soon there, so be on the lookout. ;)

Next newsletter, I’ll be sharing my painfully honest summer wavy routine. 

It’s embarrassingly simple, but I’ll share right now—there’s one key product I never leave out…more to come on that, soon.

Leave me a comment below with your thoughts on this one. I can’t wait to hear from you.

Until next time, dear friend.

xo, Alyson

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